LEARNING TO FLY

LEARNING TO FLY

Id like to share with you all, some events in my life over the last few months. But before we can continue, we first have to travel back in time a bit together.  
Since i have been 12 years old, the driving force in my life, my love, my passion, has been for sport and physical training. It has evolved and grew, and been my main form of expression, my life, for the last 14 years. I have ended careers, relationships, slept in the street, traveled all over the world and invested my entirety in the pursuit of physical training. It has been with me through some of the toughest times in my life, the one thing i could always turn to in my moment of need, the one thing when everything else was falling down round about me i could find peace in, i could find quiet in, i could find love in. It for me wasn't just physical exercise, it was never about getting healthy, getting strong, getting ripped, becoming great at a particular skill set, these were all just side effects. 
To me it was always a meditation, when the entire notion of David Kelso dropped off, and all that remained was the moment, was the action, it was a spiritual experience.  
Fast forward to a few months ago. I had just returned from Australia, I had been carrying an ongoing shoulder injury for a while, it had been getting progressively worse. So i began a course of physical therapy and rehab in an attempt to remedy it. Then, all a sudden, my other shoulder completely blew out. 2 days later, both me knees and hip blew out, i had no idea what was going on. I went to the doctors and they referred me onto various specialist and physiotherapists and began doing a series of blood test to see if anything was underlying. In the next few days, i became incredibly ill, having to sleep about 20 hours a day and absolutely exhausted at even the simplest of tasks like tying my shoes. My body was in constant agony. I've experiences my fair share of physical pain, training, fighting, injuries, marathon tattoo sessions, had the beat down more than a few times, and i would rather be getting ground and pounded 24 hours a day than have the pain i was having. The most intense toothache you can think off, all over your body seems like an adequate description. And emotionally i was spiraling fast into an intense depression. Here I was an athlete whose fitness was almost legendary with anyone id ever trained with, pretty much a cripple within a week. I've faced some troubling times in my short life, I've watched the person i loved most die, i watched the person i respected most fall before my eyes, I've had my heart broken numerous times, I've had guns shoved in my face, been imprisoned, faced my own death, and a whole host of other challenges, but this, even faced with the very idea of not being able to train, hurt more than anything else, it was killing me.  
The tests form the doctors came back, and i was sent for more and more, yet nothing was revealed, the doctors were completely puzzled and in their utter confusion fell back to their safety net- Take this medication, and that medication. Well i wasn't about to start polluting my already compromised system with chemicals, I've never taken medication, and never will. For the structural issues i began working with physios and was put on waiting lists for to see specialists and MRI scans and the like. 
I was left alone in the dark, to find my own way out, the doctors had no answers, id have to go this alone. This next piece was something wrote about 3 am one morning, unable to sleep, when my pain both physically and emotionally was at its highest. It was both my darkest night, and the turn around in my mind and heart, the breaking of the dawn. The night is always darkest, right before the dawn.  


What is it i want? What is it I want? Or more so, what is it that wants me? What is my mission? why am i here? what have i to do in this lifetime? For so very long, these questions burned within my soul, i asked them constantly, looking for meaning, for reason. But does knowing the answer- as much as one can ever know the answer in this ever changing moment- does that bring us happiness? Over the last few days, four of the people closest to me, have told me they are unhappy with the way their lives are unfolding. They have all the 'things' and comforts that society tells us is is success, and more. On the surface of their lives, it may appear like a fairytale. But still all have voiced, there is no depth to it, they do not know if it is truly what they want in life, or in other words if it is a true expression of their spirit. Underneath the distractions of their lives, there was an unrelenting calling, a calling, to break the mold, to break free, to follow their own destiny. But the most frightening thing, is to face yourself, not the idea or concept of yourself, but your very being, right here, right now. Facing that silence of ourselves, can be the most frightening thing you will ever do, it is to die before you die, but out of that silence, can rise an inspiration and passion to walk your own path toward your destiny. But does knowing this, does knowing where you want to go and what you want to do, does it bring the happiness we seek? I used to think it would, but now, i do not know. As i lie awake, sleepless in the night, there is no confusion about what I wish to do, it as clear as the moon on this cloudless night. It is a single arrow, going straight towards its target. I have no fear of death, I've walked in the land of the dead and know it is only love, there is nothing to fear. If i die when I'm 30 or a 130 it makes no difference to me, I'm ready to go at a moments notice. I don't mind what ups and down happen on the surface of my life, i don't mind if i land my dream job, if never reach my goals, if i fail in the eyes of the world, If i have nothing, I don't mind, for i have everything i can ever have. I don't mind if i ever fall in love again, for i already love everyone, every persons eyes i look into i feel oneness, and feel love. The only thing that i mind is being able to live my life with vibrant health and vitality and express fully here and now in this physical world. To feel my body move, to run in the sand, to climb the mountain, to swim in the sea, without these things i feel stuck between two worlds. Between the physical world and the unmanifested. I smile to the world, enjoying the interactions with others, and giving all the love i can, needing nothing in return. But in the silence of the night i scream, a silent scream nobody else can ever hear. I scream straight to the source of all things, that if i cannot express here and now in this physical body, then take me now. I don't care if it all ends tonight, but don't leave me hanging between worlds, Like an angel with broken wings, I cannot fly home and i can give light here on earth. Barred from the gates of heaven and unable to express the love, the fire and the light that burns inside me, burns me up. Sometimes in the night, i pray i can just go home, sometimes when driving in the car, i dream of collision, and my own breaking free. If i could only start again, i think, start fresh ,new born into the world again, wings intact, what could i do? But the fact I'm still here, means its not my time to start again, i can never start again, I can only realize everything is just beginning, right here, right now. But what do you do when the very thing you feel most inspired to do, feels like the only thing you cant? When your wings are broken, do you keep trying to fly? 
Maybe, the most important thing is that trying, no matter what happens, even if it leads to your own death. Maybe freedom is the only truth, and freedom is in action, right here, right now. Why is it i feel my life should express in certain way? Is it my ego? Have i created some self that i think i must be? Is it a mask? Am I trying to live upto this idea of David Kelso the athlete? 
And so maybe after all, knowing what you want to express, feeling inspired to walk some path, or feeling completely lost and not knowing what the hell you want to express and where your inspiration lies, maybe it matters not. Its not the knowing or unknowing that causes us suffering. Its wanting things to be different than they are right now, its being here and wanting to be there. and maybe just being in the here and now, with the confusion, the clouds will part and action will be apparent. Maybe its being here with the fire burning inside and again and again, no matter how long it takes, no matter how badly broken you think you are, just trying to fly. No matter how many times you fall, just getting back up, keep going, keep walking. The very trying is the doing, is the expression, its what lets your light shine.  


So, what happened since then?
I have my own theories about what was affecting me but through my own research and experimentation i have managed to reverse the illness, My energy has returned, in fact, its greater than it ever was, the constant pain has gone, leaving a feeling of lightness and vitality, there is still stuff to work through but thats fine. All this i did through manipulation of diet, and other healing modalities. I'm still going through ongoing work structurally with physios and specialists, I don't know how long that road is , but i just keep walking. I asked myself why did i suffer so much emotionally at the beginning of this?
I realize i was attached to the idea of myself as an athlete, as someone with great strength and flexibility. I had already faced death of my physical being and was at complete peace with that, but i had to learn to die to my notion of myself whilst i lived. Does that mean i gave up my athletic pursuits and dreams? Hell no! It means i stopped believing i had to be a certain way to be expressing that. 
The expression I love so much is movement of my body, about expressing the warriors spirit. All the rehab stuff was doing, and would have to continue to do along this path, is the expressing, walking this path, no matter what, no matter how many times i get knocked down, no matter how much pain i go through, no matter how bad it gets, is the warriors spirit expressing. Its not about winning, its not about succeeding, its not about achieving some state of imagined perfection, but about doing, right here, right now, even if that means doing nothing, its about never, ever, giving up on your path, no matter what. Its about finding the courage to continue on, no matter what happens. This IS your expression!  


A warrior is not about perfection or victory or invulnerability. He's about absolute vulnerability- Socrates  


What matters is not how hard you need to push yourself or how much others think what you have done is great or tough, or how much physical strength you have, but rather how much heart and love you bring to what you do. Right now i cant push hard, i cant train hard, right now what is needed is healing and rehab work, but just because that doesn't require the same intensity physically as deadlifts or 20 rep squats, doest mean it requires any less heart, any less focus and being. And i have learned even the simplest of actions can become a meditation, can bring me to absolute peace.  


A warrior does not give up what he loves, he finds the love in what he does - Socrates  


I have no idea if i will ever be able to train in ways i did again, I don't know if ill be able to perform again i honestly don't know, we never can. But i do know, i have the courage to find out. Happiness lies not in the destination, but rather, in the journey.  


The adventure awaits.... 
David Kelso

BEHIND THE DRAGONS FIRE

Well, Its been some time since Ive been in the position to write for this blog, as many of you may know Ive recently just returned from traveling in Australia, so i didn't really have long term access to a computer to sit down and write. As you can imagine however traveling, as it always seems to do- maybe that's why i love it so much! Did give me many subtle and not so subtle experiences of realizations, awakenings or whatever else you want to call those experiences where you come face to face with truth. So now I'm in the position to be able to write alot more again, I'd like to share with you all the realizations Ive had and continue to have, and the things i learn continually through my own evolution, or simply things i feel the urge to say. It is my hope that my words may resonate with you in some way, and point to the answers lying within each of us, or at least make you smile as you read!

Let us begin...

One thing that has become apparent to me time and time again is this- The dreams we have, we never know where they will lead us, but we have to follow them with all our passion, all our intent, no matter how difficult the road may seem, how slim our chances may appear, no matter how much anyone else tells you you cant do it, or its impossible, just follow them.

When you have a dream of any sort, or many- I know i have heaps! One that when you think about you feel tremendous joy and passion flowing through your body, when the hair on the back of your neck stands up, when you have a moment of insight 'knowing' this is what you should do, when you feel Love, for whatever it may be, maybe its an extension of something you already do, that makes you feel so much joy, a sport you play, a subject you study, a person who's company makes you happy, whatever it is, you must trust it and follow it. But we never know where following will lead us, you may very well manifest your dream into your physical experience, and enjoy every bit of it, or its manifestation may very well lead you on to another dream, all in a gradual flowering and evolving of your being, or maybe you don't even go all the way to the end of your dream, maybe the pursuit of it leads you to something else that feels even more joyous that you may never had realized had you not had the initial courage to follow your dreams. There is no end really, no beginning either, just following your passions and love, wherever they lead.

As i look back over the experience Ive had in this lifetime, it simply amazes me where following my passions and dreams has led me, many have been pursued until the seeming end vision burning in my mind has manifested, only to grow and evolve even more, limitation fallen away and boundaries shattered, some the pursuit of with all my passion and intent have led me to other dreams that i was not able to see before, whatever your dreams are, they are simply to be enjoyed for however long they last, through all their own evolution. They wont ever deliver you happiness, they are an expression of the happiness that you already are. The unfolding of your being and its mission here now, in this time, in this body.

But maybe in the very same instance you envision your dreams and a shiver of excitement runs down your spine, and a fire fills you within, in that same instance your mind filled with doubts creeps in. You start thinking how will you ever manage to do that, you cant see a way and think it impossible, your mind will offer you a million and one reasons why you cant, a million and one reasons why you are not good enough, why you are not worthy, why its impossible. Impossible is nothing and the very fact that you are here, right now, in this body means you are good enough, means you are worthy, its every single being in this universes birth right to feel joy , happiness and love.

Do not turn your mind to how something will be achieved, just focus your thoughts, your intent, your passion on your dreams, believe in them, trust them, and do whatever action is necessary in this moment, that may very well be doing nothing. Trust them , you do not know where they will lead.

You don't need other peoples support and belief in you either, even if every single person in the world told it was impossible, it matters not, you don't need other peoples support, you don't need other peoples approval, you are not living your life for anyone else, you only need your own dreams, the courage and passion to follow them and your own belief in them. Maybe your fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who encourage you to follow your dreams and who give you the greatest gift by seeing you as the unlimited being that you are. And even if you don't right now, trust in your dreams enough and you will soon find yourself surrounded by these people. I consider myself to be lucky i have a handful of true friends in my life, they type that you tell you want to be Tarzan and go and live in the jungle, and they don't tell you you are a lunatic, they come with you to the airport.

Is it really just luck? Or the fact that I've always followed my dreams no matter what that these people are in my life?

Maybe its the things we fear most that conceal our greatest of dreams, Maybe its the sport you want to play at the highest level, but your doubts tell you aren't strong enough , or fast enough, maybe its the music or art you want to create, but your doubts tell you you aren't talented enough, or you don't have enough creative spark, maybe its the person that you feel a connection with, or that you really like, or maybe someone you already love, but your doubts tell you they could never feel the same way, maybe its the world you want to travel, but your doubts tell you you will never have the funds to do it. Maybe its all these doubts all these fears that are stopping you becoming the next champion, creating the most beautiful piece of art or music the world has seen, stopping you asking that girl or guy out, or telling someone how you feel, or getting on that plane or pirate ship. Maybe its all those fears and doubts that are stopping you realizing your own true dreams. Maybe its all those fears and doubts that are preventing you from living your own life's purpose. Maybe its all those fears and doubts that are standing in your way of being an inspiration to countless people who's hearts you will touch by being true to yourself. Maybe its all those fears and doubts and not lack of skill, lack of potential, lack of gifts or talents or love that aren't allowing you to shine like the stars you are made from!

And maybe its those things masked by the greatest fear you need to follow the most

Our deepest fears are like Dragons

Guarding our deepest treasure- Rainer Maria Rilke

The Adventure awaits.........

David Kelso

UNFOLDING PERFECTION

I have come to realize a few things of late.
We never know what is going to happen next, never know where we will go, what we will do, or with whom. We know fully the universal magnitude of what we do, the unfolding perfect reasons why we are guided by our hearts and master within to walk a certain path, to take a certain action, to follow our love, to allow to express through us this perfect unfolding.
We can conceptualise and try to give intellectual reasons for what we do, or for what we love, but really we have no idea why.
Maybe we never will
And that is OK.

I do know however that we will always find ourselves exactly where we need to be, doing exactly what needs to be done, with the people we need to be with. God expresses perfection in every single moment.

Our actions are not our own to claim, our desires are not our own to claim, what we love is not our own to claim, we are simply the vehicle of expression of that love, of the moment itself, of the universe, of God.

What we do in this lifetime is not ours to claim and feel pride for, for they are not works of the human mind, they are the works of cosmic intelligence.

Who is it exactly who claims anything to be there own?

And so we can reach out and embrace whatever may come, not in fear, but rather in knowing that whatever comes, wherever the wind may blow us, wherever the wave may take us, its all perfect, everything happens for a reason, a reason far beyond out intellectual understanding.
And that is OK.
We dont need to try and control what our hearts guide us to do, what arises, try to control some outcome, but rather completely surrender, and realize that the notion we have any control what so ever over what happens is the illusion.

Its not a case of either letting or not letting God express through us, of having control or letting go, its a case of letting ourselves realize the illusion is that we have control. You can either become one and fully surrender or you can split yourself and try to resist. Resistance is creating illusion.

I recently knew i had to travel to Australia. For what reason i had no idea, i just knew i had to go, and right now. I could conceptualise and list a bunch of intellectual reasons why i had to go, but really i have no idea, or the intellectual reasons i could think up extend in a spiraling magnitude that cannot be 'understood' .
Now in Australia, i still dont have a clue for what reason, or what i will will happen next, I have realized i have no control over what will happen, or what i must do.
Maybe one day the reasons why will be revealed to me....
Or maybe they wont
And that is Ok.

I do know its for a perfect reason, and whatever happens is perfect unfolding. Right where i need to be, always, just where i am.

Letting go into the arms of God, is not letting go of control, for we never had it in the first place, its letting go of illusion.

Surrender is surrendering our resistance, our illusion.

Hand it all over, for it was never yours in the first place.

Follow your heart and nothing else

Notice how present a flower is, how surrendered to life- Eckhart Tolle

The Aventure awaits.....

Live free

Kelso

WHERE HEAVEN BEGINS

I drift away effortlessly into the moment and everything that arises, every single thing is sheer beauty, I am mesmerised. But what is that makes me melt way into the here and now, what is it that reveals to me so much divine beauty?

Is it The amazing performance of the acrobats before me on stage, is it the colours spinning and twirling through the air, is it witnessing the human form move in ways that defy what the mind believes it can do? Or is it the sounds, the silence of anticipation, the faint beat of the performers’ heart that you can feel beat in time with your own, or the thunderous roar of applause?
Is it the heat I can feel surrounding me, the heat and life energy of all those that surround me, sharing this same experience, is it the electricity surging through my body now, is it the awareness of my own breath and heartbeat of those sitting next to me, is it the company I'm with?

Or is it the moment itself? Is it the still silence that holds all of this that is happening, that is holding this ever changing canvas, holding all of existence in its mighty paw, the no- thingness, that allows all this beautiful experience to be?

A few hours have past now since the magnificent experience of the Chinese state circus, with only a few hours of sleep, Dawn is just beginning to break.

I drift away effortlessly into the moment and everything that arises, every single thing is sheer beauty. But what is that makes me melt way into the here and now, what is it that reveals to me so much divine beauty?

Is it the Scottish wilderness I see as I pass through the mighty hills and mountains, is it the brilliant colours emerging from the darkness, reflected by the first shimmering of light, is it the strange but beautiful shapes cut away into the sides of hills and rocks by the master sculptor of nature? Is it the way the stream flows down from the hillsides echoing a brilliant shimmer of life. Is it the way a lone tree hangs precariously on the edge of a hill top, living and expressing fully each and every moment? Is it the soothing noise of the pouring rain outside of the car, the life pouring from the heavens , is it this time of day, on the cusp between night and day, where a small shimmer of the breaking sun illuminates the darkness, this time when the veils between heaven and earth are thinnest. Is it the silence inside the car, is it the beating hearts of those around me, the gentle rhythms of their breath as they sleep, is it the angel sleeping on my shoulder, is it the company I'm with?

Or is it the still silence of right here, right now that is holding all this… that is experiencing all this in a single moment through my eyes, this moment where I no longer know where the earth ends and heaven begins.

And it no longer matters what it is………..

We like to separate things, reality and non reality, form and emptiness, stillness and movement, spiritual and mundane, heaven and earth. But in reality, there is no such distinction.

Form is emptiness , emptiness is form- Heart Sutra.

What arises in the moment and the moment which holds it are two sides of the same golden coin, they cannot be separated, or categorised, they are each, one and other- only one.

Every single thing that arises in this moment, every single experience, every action you take, every thought you think, every feeling you have, every once of joy, every once of sadness, every single thing is a facet to the same brilliant diamond that reflects the most beautiful of all lights.
And that diamond, that brilliant diamond that holds within it an entire universe is your own heart, the light it reflects…..
Is you.

In the most serene stillness there is movement, and in that complete movement lies the most perfect stillness.

The Adventure Awaits………
David Kelso

WOBBLING STILLNESS

We have a tendency to judge our experiences as good or bad, some of our experiences can send us spiralling upward to the gates of Heaven and others knock us down to the pits of hell- Or so it seems.

I believe that every single thing we experience, no matter how seemingly significant or insignificant, no matter how seemingly good or bad, is perfect, and stems from something far beyond what our minds can conceive of, from a wisdom that is completely unfathomable to us in our dualistic mindset, where we judge our experience, categorise our experience, separate ourselves from our experience and from everything else.

Everything that happens is perfect, things can happen no other way, because that’s the way the thing has happened. And they all happen for a perfect reason at a perfect time, and are all a complete expression - the only thing that prevents us from experiencing this perfection is our own perceptions.

We judge and categorise every experience and therefore miss the underlying perfection in it all, the underlying oneness in it all.

The practice of Zazen is a complete expression of life and so reflects all of life. People often think what sitting in Zazen ‘should’ be is some blessed out state, complete peace and serenity, utter stillness, complete oneness. And certainly for some moments during sitting, even for entire sitting or even days you do become very still, very settled, there is a dropping off of mind and body, you can feel the aliveness of every cell of your body, feel like you are not breathing but being breathed by God, and experience the most profound experiences of peace I have ever known. But there are also times when you are completely distracted by your thoughts, dragged every which way by them, you are completely distracted by your physical discomfort, your legs are numb and feel like they are about to fall off, your back tightens and wont seem to relax , your shoulders keep tensing, you are in so much pain you just want to stand up and walk out, you are so bored you feel like biting through your own tongue just for something to do, for some excitement. Most of the time though, you are just somewhere in between all that, nothing extreme at all, just sitting, wobbling between comfort and discomfort, tension and relaxation, stillness and distraction. You experience is just as it is, just sitting.

And so people begin to categorise their experience of sitting in Zazen, the peaceful, blissful moments get classified as a ‘good sitting’ the distracted, uncomfortable ones as ‘bad sitting’ . But really any such distinction is simply illusion. I’ve come to realise that my experience is perfect no matter what, that we are always wobbling, not between good or bad, but between perfection and perfection. What could be more perfect than what is?

Why would you bother doing something like that? People may ask- sounds horrible.
To me that question is the same as asking , why would you bother living?

Our lives reflect this in entirety, wobbling between perfection, that we judge and perceive as good or bad. We imagine that through our experiences we move along a line that at one end is bad and the other end is good. We all desperately try to crawl our way along that line, to finally reach the end, to reach the bliss that it promises, but it always seem we take one step forwards and two steps back on this line, the bad point of it constantly chasing our tail, creeping up on us as we look back in fear.

But if we just let go of our own judgement , of our limited perceptions, to see beyond what our vision can see, we could see, that’s both points of the line are one and the same, perfection, we are not travelling along some line at all, we are centred within a circle, perfection all around us, and we are the circle too. The great wobbling between two points that are the same, within a circle, is really no movement at all, in fact it is utter perfect stillness- Our wobbling is stillness.

It once took my heart to be broken for me to realise what was truly inside it, an unconditional love, with no opposite. To judge the situation , to call the pain of a broken heart ‘bad’ would have been to make myself blind and deaf to something magnificent, something so very beautiful, the sight and sound of my heart being broken open, opening up to that stillness that was always there, that was always ‘me’ unmoved by the seeming changes of the tide.

Fear not experiences changing, forms seeming to come and seeming to go, they are all perfect, all happening for some reason unfolding, one experience closes over so another can blossom. And they are all so very still.

Everything that happens is simply just s it is, through our perception we can see any experience as either an angel reaching down from the heavens and helping us along our way, showing us the beauty all around us, or we can see it as a demon dragging us through the dirt, holding us in darkness.
If both are illusion the question is, which one empowers us more?
You cant fight against the darkness and win, but if you just let go , just surrender, the light comes in all by itself, the demon you were facing becomes an angel, the darkness, light.

Many of us spend years stumbling through the darkness, searching for the light and joy of life. We blunder along waiting for the light to shine, trying to remain faithful, open and ready to respond. But in spite of all our efforts, the place , the timing, and the occasion of our enlightenment are often determined by forces greater than our own.- Tom Cowan

Relax- its supposed to happen!

The Adventure Awaits....

David Kelso

HOWL OF LOVE

‘If you find out what it is you love to do and give your whole life to it, then there is no contradiction, and in that state your being is your doing.’- Jiddu Krishnamurti

As someone with many passions in life, something that has arisen more than once for me and for others Ive spoken to who are also people of many passions is this- What one of my passions, when I am not attached to anything yet can see the beauty and potential in everything, then which one do I follow? Which one do I immerse myself in? Which one do I dedicate my entirety to?

Someone very wise once said to me that - ‘People become very good, become masters at doing one simple thing, and we call them great’

For a long time I asked what my one thing may be, what is I'm supposed to do , when there is so much I love?

In Reality it matters not whether in my lifetime I become a circus acrobat, a writer, a teacher, a Shaman, a musician or a tattoo artist, for they are all equal in Reality, no thing, no experience is any better or worse than any other, no life any greater, there is no lifetime, no birth, no death, for there is no coming or going, no separation, no I, there simply is. Everything, every thought, every experience, every life is just that Reality, that Oneness, Universe, God and Goddess experiencing itself through you. Or in other words- Its Reality experiencing itself through Reality.

The question then is not, what is it I choose to do with my lifetime, it is what is choosing me?
This is what speaks through our hearts, its not a case of what you think you should do, or what anyone else thinks you should do, its about when your fully open, fully expressing, what does your heart guide you to do? It is following whatever it is that you love with every ounce of yourself, it is following what you love like one single racing towards a target, you are the shooter, the arrow and the target. It is trusting completely in that which you cannot see or name. It is letting go of ‘you’ , a complete expression.

But still what if there are many things you love , how do you choose?
You don’t have to

By following what you love, by doing what’s in your heart, what’s most important to you, things have a tendency to align and adjust themselves, some things may drop away from your experience, others may appear, whatever it you do is evolving through you. By letting whatever falls away and whatever arises naturally requires true honesty with oneself, it requires non attachment, non clinging, non judgement and no resistance, it requires complete surrender, and that is complete strength.

I grew up first and foremost training in the martial arts, as what I do has evolved through me I found my love and passion for my martial arts training evolving and changing over the years towards circus performance, towards displays of freak strength and flexibility. This to me was a natural progressions that came simply from listening to and following my heart, no agonising decision was ever required. Now in my training I don’t practice martial arts, handstands and splits have become my art, my expression, not for any lack of love, passion or inspiration from the martial arts, but form simply allowing whatever wants to express through me free.
Everything evolves……and yet no-thing changes.
It’s a matter of doing whatever it is you love, until what your supposed to do finds you.

Courage and brutal honest are needed at every moment, its easy to mistake instant gratification for your hearts desire if you are asleep, you have to be fully alert, fully alive, listening to the silence.
Going to a party on a Saturday night with free food and free drink sounds at first a hell of a lot more appealing than doing dead lifts outside in the pissing rain, but then , as I find myself warming up and heading outside to face the iron its clear to me what I truly want, what is truly expressing through me,

What is it that wants to express through you?
Listen
Truly listen……

As i look look now to the night moon, as the thunder of love bangs in my heart and courses through my veins, it fills my lungs and a mighty howl passes from my lips, i know now why i howl, the moon and i, the moon and the wolf, we are one. This is love.

The Adventure awaits.....

David Kelso

THE PHOENIX OF STILLNESS

The universe manifests itself through us at every single moment, it is us, and is the moment itself.
The manifest world seems to change, old forms dying, new forms being born , one moment, one hour, one day, one year, one lifetime ending and a new one constantly being reborn. The moment itself which we are completely inseparable from seems to die and be born anew.
The phoenix has been a symbol throughout many cultures and many thousands of years for this cycle of death and rebirth, of new rising from the ashes of the old.

A phoenix is a mythical bird with a tail that is beautiful gold and red plumage. At the end of its life-cycle the phoenix builds itself a nest of cinnamon twigs that it then ignites; both nest and bird burn fiercely and are reduced to ashes, from which a new, young phoenix arises.

This appears to us as apparent truth, and on the surface of things, it certainly is. But as we go deeper down the rabbit hole that is reality an entirely different truth begins to be realized.
Hold on Alice-

There is no birth and no death, there just is

There is only ever right now, there is complete expression right now, nothing else, no before, no after, just this moment as it is right now. The past exists in you as a memory, but it exists right now, the future lives as a dream, but it dreams through you right now.
In this fleeting moment, in this complete expression of everything and no-thing there is complete and utter stillness, no motion that is the womb for all motion.
For birth and death there must be ‘someone’ or ‘something’ to be born and to die, and this takes us to the very question that echoes like thunder into reality- who is this me?
What we think we are and what we believe other things around us to be are mental concepts we use to label and differentiate, the ego, its opinions and its beliefs.
That is not to say there isn’t something …..

Something ineffable

The phoenix that lives, the phoenix that dies, the phoenix that burns up, the phoenix that rises above the flames at every stage, at every moment, just is, it is complete expression right now. At the heart of its evolution, at the heart of beauty at the heart of its rising, there is only stillness, there is no best or greatest moment that its been waiting for, it expresses fully, every moment. In this moment it is, and so are you!

Its always just beginning.
Everything is always just beginning- Jakusho Kwong

The Adventure awaits......

David Kelso